Saturday, May 21, 2011


I believe in medication. 

I also believe in the divine power of my God who can heal all things . . . if He wanted to.  I also believe sometimes we are not healed for a reason, that we must go through certain things for a BIGGER cause, one we might not even see before we die. 

I have never prayed for Autumn to be "cured" from her Autism, ADHD, or ODD.  Not because I don't think God could do it . . . okay maybe I do have some doubt . . . but mostly because I it never crossed my mind to pray for a cure.  When someone has a physical ailment the first thing I do is pray.  So why, when someone is suffering mentally do I shy away from prayer? 

I have never prayed for myself to be "cured" from my depression.  Have I rebuked Satan and asked him to get behind me when I'm at the depths of despair?  Absolutely!  Has it worked? Absolutely!  So why, when I'm suffering mentally do I shy away from prayer?

Am I too dependant on medication?  I don't think I am.  Medication for me is not my substitute for calling on Jesus.  It's not my substitute for relying on God.  I believe God gave me the medication as a way to survive.  I also believe that God gave Autumn her medications as a way to survive.

I changed Autumn's medication last week.  She went from Respridal to Geodon.  Both are atypical anti-psychotic medications that treat schizophrenia and bi-polar however the FDA has recently approved these medications for children with Autism.  With out them Autumn would be a wreck. 

The transition has been smooth.  She had one day that she did not have any medication in her system ... that was a bad day.  Her hyper-sensitivity to sound was at a level so high I thought she was going to craw out of her skin.  Every time someone chewed food she would freak out and cover her ears.  I then gave her the Geodon 20mg starting one time a day on Sunday.  Nights were rough but I couldn't give her a second dose until we knew she was doing ok on the Geodon.  Today she got the 3pm dose and it's been great.

The best part about the switch???  It had the affect I wanted, her appetite is back to normal and hopefully she will now lose some of the weight she gained on the Resperdal.

The worst part about the switch???  Geodon does not have a generic so instead of paying $15 like I did for the Risperdal I have to pay $100!!!  It's a sin.  Thank goodness my parents have offered to pay my co-pay for me.  They are such a blessing.

So for now Autumn and I are staying on our medications and we are better for it.  We are able to love each other and other people and I believe God intended it that way. 

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