Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Life and Death

Today was literally filled with Life and Death.  I woke to a text message from one of my managers.  She told me her sister had passed away early this morning.  She was 50 years old and had battled breast cancer for 5 years.  It was only 2 weeks ago that my manager's sister told her that her fight was over.  I asked my manager what happened, I thought her sister was doing okay.  She told me that for 5 years her sister fought cancer, fought hard.  The pattern would go like this:

chemo . . . radiation . . . bad days . . . chemo . . . radiation . . . bad days

My manager thought that this Thanksgiving was just another bad day . . . until her sister told her that the cancer had spread to her liver.   My manager waited for her sister to tell her what the next treatment was, she always told her what the next step would be.

What is the next step???  Her sister did not answer.  She said . . . "that's it, there is no next step".  Two weeks later she died.

I can't imagine losing a sister.  I just can't. 

Life is extremely fragile.  God is in total control.  I don't mean to get morbid but it's true.  We have no control.  Every relationship we have could end tomorrow.  EVERY ONE. 

My day began with death however ended with life. 

My second job is as an adoption caseworker for a private adoption agency in New Jersey.   Tonight I had to do a routine Post Placement Supervision for a family who was placed with an adorable newborn 4 months ago.  This is a New Jersey placement so I am required to complete 4 supervisions before the adoption can be finalized.  I was the one who approved this family during their home study process so I have known them and was routing for them during their wait to add a child to their family of three.  They have a 7-year-old biological son and have turned to adoption to grow their family.

This family was matched with a birth family within 6 months.  This is not typical and was very fast.  In August they welcomed their daughter into their home.  The birth mother and father already had a son and could not financially or emotionally care for another child.  They painstakingly decided to parent their second child through adoption.

The adoptive couple was at the hospital with the birth family when their daughter was born via c-section.  Since the birth of their daughter the families have communicated via email and the adoptive family has sent pictures and updates of their daughter. 

Tonight was my third visit and all family members are doing great!  The baby is growing strong and healthy.  This visit reminded me of how lucky I am to have my two daughters.  Although it is extremely difficult at times to parent them on my own I know that there are women and men who can not have children of their own. 

I am extremely blessed to have given life to my two beautiful daughters.  I am also blessed to have had the ability to parent them. 

Life and Death.  Both are so fragile. 

God is in control. 

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